No change can stick in the conscious; true transformation of an individual can only happen permanently or fairly permanently in the subconscious.
After more than 20 years in coaching, training and therapy work, experience tells me that no change can stick in the conscious; true transformation of an individual can only happen permanently or fairly permanently in the subconscious. If one can change significantly through conscious means, then we shall have smokers quit smoking, alcoholics quit drinking, etc. or even phobias cured by just thinking of wanting to quit or to stop it! How come this doesn’t happen?
Please bear with me. First, one has to understand the theory of the ‘two-sides of the brain’. On the left side is the logical mind, which is accessible to our senses, i.e. the conscious part of us that is aware of what we see hear and feel. The left logical mind is also called the conscious, analytical, rational, linear or objective mind. This side of the brain is responsible for handling data, facts and analysis which we have been trained to use very well in school or university as most of the subjects in schools and universities are highly objective and logical; except for arts, music and a few other subjects. And most people in the world are very familiar with using this part of the brain and if one is very critical and sharp at analysis or logical thinking, we’ll say his/her IQ is high. They will be the one to solve logical problems such as mathematical, mechanical, electrical, engineering, scientific, systems, and documentation, etc. well.
On the other right side of brain, lies the emotional mind, which is not assessable to our conscious five usual senses. Hence, it is also called the subconscious mind, which is highly creative, intuitive or subjective. This subconscious side of us is responsible for handling our emotions, moods, romance, music which hold our values, beliefs, attitudes, habits, and mindsets – the subjective part of us. And if you are high functioning on this part of your brain, then we’ll say your EQ is high.
More often than not, most of us do not know when and which brain we ought to use in what situation. Bottom-line, the rule-of-thumb is if we have a logical problem we must use our left brain to solve it; but if we have a subjective or emotional problem, we must and only use our right brain to resolve the issue. Most leaders will admit that their main problems at work are not about issues with machines, systems, documentations or logistic, which very well could be; but their major issues in most cases are with PEOPLE! And if we are dealing or handling people problems, we must and only use our right EQ brain and hence, apply right brain techniques to resolve it.
A point to note is: I tend to refer this subconscious mind as the less logical part of us and will even call it the ‘illogical mind’; and this makes sense since if the left is logical, then, the right must be illogical! Logically speaking, isn’t it?. Just look at people who became highly emotional like very angry we shall say, in the Queens’ English, that ‘he is mad with anger’; right? Also notice that all very creative individuals are slightly illogical and/or doesn’t make sense in the way they present themselves sometimes!
So, if we were to ask whether the attitudes or habits of a person are easy to change. Most people shall agree or lament that it is difficult. Why? Because, since most people know how to use the left brain well from school, they are unfamiliar with the workings of the very powerful subconscious right brain which is responsible for his attitudes or habits. Therefore, changes in a persons’ attitude, mindset or habit cannot happen in the conscious mind. For example, all smokers know logically that it is bad for their health to smoke and that if he/she stops smoking, their health will be better or they’ll at least breathe easier. On the other hand, one doesn’t change because of logics as logics only appeals to the left brain; more over our habits are in the wrong department – it’s on the right-side! Hence, thinking about (using the left brain) changing our mindset or habit doesn’t actually change it.
Now, it is quite clear how come I say earlier, which I want to reiterate here, that: “true transformation of an individual can only happen permanently or fairly permanently in the subconscious”. Hence, if we want to change our own self or help someone else change, we cannot usually consciously tell or advise them to change. The information will enter their conscious left brain and drop out; unless what you tell or advise them have significant emotional meaning to them personally. This is the reason Dr William Horton, the founder of the National Federation of Neuro Linguistic Programming, who certified me as NLP Master Trainer says: ‘advice is the cheapest commodity, no one wants it’!
That being said, if we do want to be a transformational leader and so help our staff transform, we are not to advise or tell them to change. That will be the least effective method! What will work much better to transform their mindsets will be to assess their subconscious mind and help them reprogramme their, so to say, subconscious programmes in their right brain. This we can do easily with many NLP tools such as:
• Affirmations
• Pacing and Leading
• Reframing
• Negating Language Patterns
• Tonalities
• Various Questioning Techniques
• Q-tags
• Embedded Commands
• Meta Models
• Milton Models, etc
For this reason, Dr William Horton defines NLP simply as the “upgrading of the software in our head (the subconscious mind) from Win 98 to Win 8/10”. Therefore, if you want to know more about the tools available to influence and help people change easily, do engage an NLP coach to realize your potential to change immediately and get the results in life you want soonest.
In this article, I shall offer you one NLP tool which, has been proven to transform mindsets easily, is Affirmation. Affirmations are very positive phrases and when said with confidence and belief can be highly effective to even remove unconscious negative thoughts or worries. A great affirmation for personal growth is:
“Everyday and Everyway, I think and feel more and more positive and confident of myself”.
All you need to do is to say it 10 times just before and just after sleep (when the subconscious mind is most impressionable) repeatedly for 14 days and watch what happens to your unconscious negative thoughts, worries or self-talk. It will work wonders for you!
And if you need to learn and understand more how the NLP tools are very powerful to transform and enhance our lives quickly and easily, do allow yourself to be coached.
Mr. Daniel Wong
Master Trainer & Coach
Daniel, an International Master NLP Trainer, has more than 29 years experience in the corporate world, out of which 18 years has been spent on coaching and training: teaching Communication & Interpersonal Skills, Coaching & Negotiation skills - training Companies and individuals on Sales, Management & Leadership Skills, Course Consulting, Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) and Sub-conscious learning skills. And in the process, continually coaching and motivating all his students, staffs and associates to learn, grow and expand their personal paradigms and horizons.